Uma sikhuluma ngokugomela, sibhekisela ekhonweni labantu kukho khuluma ngezinto ozifunayo, izidingo noma imicabango yakho ngaphandle kokulimaza noma ukucasula abanye abantu.
Ukuzimela kufana namakhono amahle okuxhumana nabantu, kodwa futhi kusivumela ukuthi sibe namathuluzi adingekayo okuvikela amalungelo ethu ngaphandle kokuhlasela abanye noma ukuhlaselwa.
yini ukuqinisa
Ukuqiniseka kungaba yingxenye yobuntu bakho, yendlela ojwayele ukuxhumana ngayo nawe kanye nabanye. Amakhono abonakala ebudlelwaneni babantu futhi agwema ulaka lwanoma yiluphi uhlobo (olusebenzayo noma olungenzi lutho) kodwa azi ukuthi kufanele ubeke imingcele futhi uvikele amalungelo ethu.
Uzwela kunoma yikuphi, kunendima ebalulekile ohlelweni lokugomela. Kuyisisekelo sokukwazi ukugcina ukuhlalisana okuhle njengoba ungakwazi ukuveza umbono wakho ngokuqinile ngaphandle kwesidingo sokulimaza abanye abantu.
Ukuzethemba ikuvumela ukuthi uveze imicabango yakho, imizwa, imizwa, imibono… ngendlela efanele, uzihloniphe futhi ngaphandle kwesidingo sokusebenzisa ulaka noma udlame. Ukuziphatha kwakho kuzoncika ekuhlonipheni wena kanye nakwabanye.
Izibonelo zokusebenzisa ukugomela
Ukuze uqonde kangcono ukuthi kuyini ukugomela nokuthi ungakusebenzisa kanjani empilweni yakho, sizokunikeza izibonelo ezithile. Ngale ndlela, uzokwazi ukubalandela ukuze uqale ukusebenzisa leli khono elibalulekile lezenhlalo empilweni yakho futhi uqaphele ushintsho oluhle ebudlelwaneni bakho nabanye abantu.
Isibonelo se-1
ukuxhumana okungenasisekelo
Awunamsebenzi, uhlezi unephutha ngento eyodwa (kulomusho uyahlulela futhi ujeqeze, ube nolaka komunye umuntu)
Ukuxhumana okuqinisekisayo
Ngibonile ukuthi amafomu aniwagcwalisanga ngendlela futhi lokhu kudale ukubambezeleka emnyangweni, nibonile? Ingabe udinga usizo lwanoma yiluphi uhlobo? (Kuwumusho wokugomela ngoba ukhuluma ngesenzo somunye umuntu, umthelela esiwudalile futhi uqinisekiswa ngokunikeza usizo.
Isibonelo se-2
ukuxhumana okungenasisekelo
Awuzimisele ngokusebenza, kuhlezi kwenzeka kuwena. (Kulo musho kwahlulelwa futhi kwenziwa jikelele)
Ukuxhumana okuqinisekisayo
Ngibonile ukuthi kuleli sonto ubambezele kabili izibopho zethu, ngingathanda ukuthi usigcine isikhathi. (Ibinzana eligomelayo ngoba lokho okukukhathazayo kukhonjisiwe futhi isicelo senziwa kumuntu wokuqala wokuziphatha ukuze kuthuthukiswe).
Isibonelo se-3
ukuxhumana okungenasisekelo
Uhlala ungifaka kabi. (Kuwumusho osola omunye umuntu futhi isikhulumi sizifaka yena esikhundleni sokuba isisulu).
Ukuxhumana okuqinisekisayo
Uma ukhuluma nami kanjalo ungenza ngiphatheke kabi, ngifuna ukhulume nami ngezwi elingcono. (Igama eligomelayo ngoba lokho okukukhathazayo kukhonjisiwe futhi kwenziwa isicelo kumuntu wokuqala ukwenza ushintsho).
Isibonelo se-4
ukuxhumana okungenasisekelo
Awunginaki futhi uyangikhipha empilweni yakho. (Kusolwa omunye futhi umuntu okhulumayo uzifaka yena esikhundleni sokuba isisulu).
Ukuxhumana okuqinisekisayo
Ngesikhathi ungangimemi emcimbini wakho ngizizwe ngishiywe ngaphandle futhi angiqondi ukuthi ukwenzeleni, kungiphatha kabi kakhulu ukuthi wenze lokho. (Umuntu okhulumayo uthatha umthwalo wemfanelo ngemizwa yakhe, uchaza ukuthi yini emkhathazile, umthelela okube nawo emizweni yakhe).
Isibonelo se-5
ukuxhumana okungenasisekelo
Awukaze ungilalele noma unginake, noma lokho enikushoyo kwenziwa noma akwenziwa lutho. (Omunye umuntu ujwayelekile futhi wahlulelwa).
Ukuxhumana okuqinisekisayo
Lapho ngikutshela ngombono wami owawuhlukile kowakho, kwabonakala kimi ukuthi uphatheke kabi, akunjalo? Uthini umbono wakho ngaleso sihloko? (Khuluma ngomuntu wokuqala, ucacise ukuthi kwenzekeni, qinisekisa umcabango womunye umuntu futhi ufune ukuvumelana).
Izibonelo zezimpendulo ezigomelayo
Kwesinye isikhathi, ukugomela kufanele kwenzeke ngenxa yezicelo ezenziwe kithi noma engxoxweni esicwiliswe kuyo. Ezinye izibonelo:
- Impendulo eqinile ekungqubuzaneni ngamazwi: Uxolo, kukhona engifuna ukukutshela kona kodwa uyangiphazamisa; khuluma nami ngaphandle kokumemeza ukuthi ngikhuluma nawe ngezwi elimnandi, njll.
- Isixazululo esiphelele sidinga: Ngiyakuzwa okushoyo/okwenza kimina kodwa...
- Impendulo ngizizwa: Uma wenza, ngiyezwa; lapho ungitshela, ngezwa; Ngincamela ukuthi ungitshele, njll.
- Impendulo eqinile ku-aggressive: Uma ucasuka/ungithethisa ngeke ngikwazi ukuziveza kahle. Uma uyeka futhi ungezwa engikutshela khona, siphinde siqhubeke nengxoxo.
- Phendula AKUKHO ukulalela okusebenzayo: Angikwazi ukuya esidlweni sasemini senkampani, nakuba ngazi ukuthi ufuna ngempela ngihambe, kodwa akwenzeki ngempela ukuthi ngihambe.
- Phendula CHA ukucabanga: Ngiyabonga ngokungimema emzini wakho nakuba ngincamela ukungayi ngoba ngalelo langa nginezinye izinhlelo.
- AYI impendulo yesikhashana: Ngiyabonga ngokungimema kwakho yize ngincamela ukungayi ngoba ngalelo langa nginezinye izinhlelo, sizoyibona yini enye impelasonto?
- Impendulo ekusesheni isibopho senkampani yangaphandle: Uqonde ukuthini nge...?
- Impendulo yokukhumbula amalungelo akho: Nginelungelo loku...
Njengoba ubona, sichaze izibonelo eziningi zokugomela ongazisebenzisa ekuphileni kwakho kwansuku zonke, kokubili ebudlelwaneni bakho bomuntu siqu nasemsebenzini. Okubalulekile ngaphezu kwakho konke ukuthi ungahlala uzolile. Kubalulekile ukuthi wazi ukuthi unelungelo emhlabeni lokuveza imizwa yakho nemizwa yakho ngokucacile nangokufushane.
Unelungelo lokuphazamisa ingxoxo uma kufanele bakunikeze izincazelo ngesizathu esithile. Kumele uzenze uhlonishwe ngabanye abantu, kodwa ngaphezu kwakho konke, kumele uzihloniphe ukuze lokho kwenzeke.
Ukuzibophezela kungukugcina ukuxhumana okunenhlonipho nokuhlanzekile nabanye, kucabangela imizwa nemizwa yabanye... kodwa ngaphezu kwakho konke, futhi okubaluleke nakakhulu, kufanele ucabangele imicabango yakho, imizwa, imizwa namalungelo. Ungaba umuntu ogomelayo ngalezi zibonelo zokugomela futhi uthuthukise ubudlelwano bakho bomuntu siqu namuhla!