+115 Amabinzana ahlekisayo kunye ahlekisayo

Uninzi lwabantu luthanda ukukhangela amabinzana kwizihloko ezahlukeneyo ezinje ngokuphuculwa, inkuthazo, ukubonakaliswa, phakathi kwabanye. Nangona kunjalo, zikhona amabinzana ahlekisayo kunye nokonwaba okunokusenza sonwabe; nokuba uzifundele wedwa okanye nabanye abantu, kwaye uzisebenzise kwiinethiwekhi zethu zonxibelelwano ukuze wenze uburharha kwiimpapasho zethu.

Ezona binzana zihlekisayo

Ubomi bethu ngamanye amaxesha bunokuba nzima okanye sihlala sinomdla kwimisebenzi kwaye singathathi ixesha lokuhleka. Kungenxa yoko le nto sasifuna ukuqokelela la mabinzana ahlekisayo ngoncumo; kuba siqinisekile ukuba ngaphezulu kwesinye kunokwenza ukuba ufumane uncumo olunye. Ukongeza, uyakumangaliswa kukubona amabinzana omntu odumileyo ngolu chuku loburharha.

  • Ewe ndiyaqonda. Nditsho neminyaka emihlanu ubudala ndiyayiqonda. Ndiziseleni umntwana oneminyaka emihlanu !!! -Groucho Marx.
  • Ndiyazi amakhulu amadoda angakuvuyela ukugoduka ngaphandle komfazi ebalindile. Susa abafazi emtshatweni kwaye akusayi kubakho mtshato. -Groucho Marx.
  • Ndinobukrelekrele kangangokuba ngamanye amaxesha andiqondi ukuba nditsho nelinye igama kulento ndiyithethayo. -Oscar Wilde.
  • Akunyanzelekanga ukuba ube sisilumko xa uhleka ii-farts, kodwa kuya kufuneka ube sisidenge ukuze ungenzi. -Louis CK
  • Ngaba uhlawule ityala? Isiko elingenangqondo ngokwenene eli! -Groucho Marx.
  • Yabona, ingxaki kukuba uThixo wanika umntu ingqondo kunye nepipi, kunye negazi elaneleyo ukuba liqhube enye ngexesha. -URobin Williams.
  • Inkonzo yegumbi? Ndinike igumbi elikhulu. -Groucho Marx.
  • Ukuhlekisa kukuthabatha iintlungu njengesiqhulo. - UMax Eastman.
  • Andicingi ukuba nabani na makabhale ngobomi bakhe de bafe. -USamuel Goldwyn.
  • Izilumko ziyathetha kuba zinento eziyithethayo. Izidenge zithetha kuba kufuneka zithethe into. - UPlato
  • Nabani na angabinakhaya; konke okufunekayo ngumfazi ofanelekileyo, ibha elungileyo kunye nabahlobo abafanelekileyo. - UBill Hicks.
  • Kuyamangalisa ukuba iindaba ezenzeka ehlabathini yonke imihla zihlala zilungile kwiphephandaba. -UJerry Seinfield.
  • USanta Claus wayenombono olungileyo: undwendwela abantu kanye ngonyaka. -Victor Borge.
  • Bendihlala ndifuna ukuba ngumntu, kodwa ngoku ndiyaqonda ukuba bekufanele ukuba ndicacile. -Ulily Tomlin.
  • Ndingathanda ukukuncamisa kodwa ndizihlambile iinwele zam. -UBette Davis.
  • Ukuzibekel 'amangomso izinto kukuhambisana nesingqisho sayizolo. -UDon Marquis.
  • Fumana iinyani kuqala, emva koko ungazigqwetha ngendlela othanda ngayo. -UMark Twain.
  • UThixo uyakundixolela: yiofisi yakhe. - UHeinrich Heine.
  • Wayedla ngokuthengisa ifanitshala ukuze aphile. Ingxaki kukuba, babengabam. -Les Dawson.
  • Ndiyavuma ukuba uninzi lweziqhulo zam zibubudenge. Ndiyalivuma elam icala lokusola kwinkqubo yobudenge belizwe. -UJim Carrey.
  • Le yimigaqo yam. Ukuba awuyithandi, ndinabanye. -Groucho Marx.
  • Izibalo ezithandekayo, nceda ukhule kwaye usombulule iingxaki kum. Ndidiniwe kukusombululela zona. - Ongaziwayo.
  • Ungoyena mfazi mhle endakha ndambona, ongathethi kakhulu ukuba uyavuma. -Groucho Marx.

  • Xa ndisifa ndifuna ukutshiswa kwaye iipesenti ezilishumi zothuthu lwam luza kulahlwa kumqeshi wam. -Groucho Marx.
  • Andiyiyo imifuno kuba ndiyazithanda izilwanyana; Kungenxa yokuba ndizithiyile izityalo. -UWhitney Brown.
  • Ndifumana umabonwakude efundisa kakhulu. Ngalo lonke ixesha umntu eyilayita, ndibuyela kwelinye igumbi ndifunde incwadi. -Groucho Marx.
  • Umphulaphuli olungileyo uhlala ecinga ngenye into. -Kin Hubbar.
  • Kumatheko awusoze uhlale phantsi, umntu ongamthandiyo unokuhlala ecaleni kwakho. -Groucho Marx.
  • Ukuba senqanaweni kufana nokuba usentolongweni unokurhaxwa. -Groucho Marx.
  • Igama elithi aerobics livela kumagama amabini esiGrike: aero, okuthetha ukukwazi, kunye ne-bic, okuthetha ukunyamezela isithukuthezi esikhulu. -UDave Barry.
  • Ndichithe unyaka kuloo dolophu, ngeCawa. -George Burns.
  • Owona mbonakaliso ucacileyo wokuba ubomi obukrelekrele bukho kwenye indawo kwindalo iphela kukuba khange khe izame ukunxibelelana nathi. - UCalvin noHobbes.
  • Ayizizo zonke iikhemikhali ezimbi. Ngaphandle kweekhemikhali ezinje ngehydrogen neoksijini, umzekelo, besingakwazi ukwenza amanzi, eyona nto ibalulekileyo kwibhiya. -UDave Barry.
  • Hleka kwaye umhlaba uza kuhleka nawe, urhona kwaye uza kulala wedwa. -U-Anthony Burgess.
  • Sukuba nexhala, olona suku lubi ebomini bakho luya kuhlala kwiiyure ezingama-24. - Ongaziwayo.
  • Ubomi abuseyonto yokuhlekisa kum; Andiboni lubabalo. - UCharles Chaplin
  • Kungcono uthule ubonakale usisidenge, kunokuba uthethe uphelise ukungathandabuzeki kwakho kokulungileyo. -Groucho Marx.
  • Kulumkele ukufunda iincwadi zempilo. Ungafa ngempazamo. -UMark Twain.
  • Ihlaya yinto enzulu kakhulu. -Winston Churchill.
  • Ezinye izinto zibhetele zingashiywanga. Kodwa ndiza kunxila kwaye ndizitsho phofu. - Ongaziwayo.
  • Hleka kwaye umhlaba uya kuhleka nawe; kukhala kunye nehlabathi, likunikela umva, liya kukuvumela ukuba ukhale. - UCharles Chaplin
  • Ngaphandle kwenja, incwadi mhlawumbi ingoyena mhlobo usenyongweni womntu, kwaye ngaphakathi kwenja kusenokwenzeka ukuba kumnyama kakhulu ukuba ingafundwa. -Groucho Marx.
  • Emva koko kufike ipolisa: "Yitsho oonobumba ngasemva." Ewe, siza kwenza ntoni kuye, undifumene. Andinxilanga, kodwa kuyacaca ukuba ndisisidenge kakhulu ukuqhuba. - UBill Hicks.
  • Kukho abo baphula imilindo yokubulala ixesha. - Woody Allen.
  • Indoda ephumeleleyo ngumntu ofumana imali engaphezulu kunokuchitha inkosikazi yakhe. Umfazi ophumeleleyo unokufumana indoda enjalo. -Lana Turner.
  • Ihlala imnyama phambi kokuba kube mnyama. - UPaul Newman.
  • Into endizisola ngayo kobu bomi kukuba andinguye omnye. - Woody Allen

  • Ukuba uThixo wayefuna ukuba sibhabhe, ngewayesinike amatikiti. -UMel Brooks.
  • Into embi ngothando kukuba uninzi luyayiphambanisa nesifo sokukrala kwestritis kwaye, xa baphilisiwe kokungafuneki, bafumanisa ukuba batshatile. -Groucho Marx
  • Uburharha yeyona nto iphambili ekubonakalisweni kweendlela zomntu ngamnye. -Sigmund Freud.
  • Unokubonakala njengesidenge kwaye enze njengesiyatha. Kodwa musa ukukhohliswa. Usisidenge nyani. -Groucho Marx.
  • Ndiyakholelwa kwithamsanqa. Ungayichaza njani enye impumelelo yabo ungabathandiyo? -Jean Cocteau.
  • Ngokwenene ndinomzimba weembaleki. Kuya kufuneka ndizame nzima ukukhangela ukutyeba. -Ungaba uFerrell.
  • Andiqondi ukuba kutheni umntu enokuchitha unyaka ebhala inoveli xa enokuthenga ngokulula kwiidola ezimbalwa. - UFred Allen.
  • Zininzi izinto ebomini ezibaluleke ngaphezu kwemali… kodwa zibiza kakhulu! -Groucho Marx.
  • Ekuphela kwexesha umfazi anokuphumelela ngalo ukutshintsha indoda kuxa elusana. "Natalie Wood."
  • Ukuqala kwam ukucula ecaweni; abantu abangamakhulu amabini batshintsha inkolo yabo. —UFred Allen.
  • Kuqala ugqirha wandixelela iindaba ezimnandi: Ndizakuba nesifo esithiywe ngegama lam. - USteve Martin.
  • Ukuba intaba iza kuwe, baleka, kuba iyawa. - Ongaziwayo.
  • Indalo yonke yingcinga nje emfutshane engqondweni kaThixo. Kukho into ephazamisayo, ngakumbi ukuba uhlawule imali mboleko yokuthenga indlu. - Woody Allen
  • Eyona nto imbi ngamadoda kukuba awahlali ekufutshane nam. -Lana Turner.
  • Ndanikwa ingqalelo ngokuba ngumntu ohlekisayo esikolweni, ndizenze ngathi ndishiyekile, kwaye ndixhume ngesandla esinesiphene. -Leonardo Dicaprio.
  • Bendihlala ndicinga ukuba andinazigqibo, kodwa ngoku andiqinisekanga. - Ongaziwayo.
  • Ndiyaneliseka ngokulula ngeyona nto intle. -Winston Churchill.
  • Ndiyathanda ukuhamba ixesha elide, ngakumbi xa zithathwa ngabantu abandicaphukisayo. - UFred Allen.
  • Nyana wam, ukonwaba kwenziwa ngezinto ezincinci: I-yacht encinci, indlu encinci, ithamsanqa elincinci ... -Groucho Marx
  • Nabani na othi banokubona ngabafazi ulahlekile kakhulu. -Groucho Marx.
  • Njalo khumbula ukuba wahluke ngokupheleleyo. Njengaye wonke umntu. - UMargaret Mead.
  • Imfihlo yobomi kukunyaniseka nokudlala ngokufanelekileyo, ukuba ungayikhohlisa, uyenzile. -Groucho Marx.
  • Ndifuna urhwaphilizo ngakumbi okanye ithuba elingaphezulu lokuthatha inxaxheba kuyo. -U-Ashleigh oqaqambileyo.

  • Umtshato liziko elikhulu. Ewe uyathanda ukuhlala kwiziko. -Groucho Marx.
  • Ukwabelana ngesondo phakathi kwabantu ababini kuyinto entle; phakathi kwesihlanu kuyinto emnandi ... - Woody Allen.
  • Ukwabelana ngesondo yeyona nto imnandi onokuyenza ngaphandle kokuhleka. - Woody Allen.
  • Uxolo ukuba ndinibiza ngamadoda, kodwa andikwazi nje kakuhle. -Groucho Marx.
  • Yonke into imnandi, okoko nje isenzeka komnye umntu. - Ngaba uRogers.
  • Emva kwayo yonke indoda enkulu ngumfazi omkhulu. Emva kwakhe ngumfazi wakhe. -Groucho Marx.
  • Musa ukwamkela ukuphatha kwabantu ongabaziyo ngaphandle kokuba bekusa endaweni. - Ongaziwayo.
  • Ukuba bekungekho ngombane, sonke ngesibukele umabonwakude ngokukhanyisa ikhandlela. -George Gobal.
  • Ukusukela oko ndathatha incwadi yakhe ndawela phantsi ndiqengqeleka yintsini. Ngenye imini ndiyathemba ukuyifunda. -Groucho Marx
  • Iwayini bubungqina bokuba uThixo uyasithanda kwaye uyasithanda ukusibona sonwabile. -Benjamin Franklin.
  • Intelekelelo ithuthuzela umntu ngento angeyiyo; uburharha buyamthuthuzela ukuba ungubani na. - UFrancis Bacon.
  • Usuku ngaphandle kwelanga, uyazi, bubusuku. - USteve Martin.
  • Abasetyhini abafuni ukuva ukuba ucinga ntoni. Abasetyhini bafuna ukuva ukuba bacinga ntoni… ngelizwi elinzulu. -Bill Cosby.
  • Kuya kufuneka ndiye kugqirha wamehlo, kodwa andiwuboni umzuzu. - Ongaziwayo.
  • Ndicaphule ndisithi ndicatshiwe. -Groucho Marx.
  • Kutheni le nto belubiza ngokuba luthando xa bethetha ngesondo? -Groucho Marx.
  • Ukwabelana ngesondo kufana nokudlala ibhulorho. Ukuba awunalo iqabane elilungileyo, kungcono ube nesandla esihle. - Woody Allen.
  • Ndimele ndivume ukuba ndizalwe ndimncinci kakhulu. -Groucho Marx.
  • Ukungazi kwakhe yi-encyclopedic. -Abba Eban.
  • Ukuba unokukhaba umntu onoxanduva lweengxaki zakho ezininzi, awunakuhlala phantsi inyanga. - Roosevelt.
  • Ndifuna ukulala. Ndidinga malunga neeyure ezisibhozo ngosuku, kwaye malunga neshumi ebusuku. - UBill Hicks.
  • Ukuba uza kwenza into ngobu busuku oziva uzisole ngayo ngomso kusasa, lala ebusuku. -UHenny Youngman.
  • Kuhlala kumnandi de umntu enzakale. Ke kumnandi kakhulu. - UBill Hicks.
  • Ukuba ekuqaleni awuphumeleli, beka ityala kubazali bakho. -UMarcelene Cox.

  • Kutheni le nto umthiyile umntu ngombala wesikhumba sakhe xa kukho izizathu ezingcono zokumthiya? -UDenis Leary.
  • Boleka imali kumntu ongenathemba. Abalindelanga ukuba ibuyiselwe kubo. - Ongaziwayo.
  • Uburharha lilizwi; Ndiyisebenzisa rhoqo kwaye ndiyaphambana ngayo. Ngenye imini ndiza kufumana ukuba kuthetha ntoni. -Groucho Marx
  • UNietzsche uthi siyakuphila ubomi obufanayo kwakhona, Thixo, emva koko kuya kufuneka ndibone iarhente yeinshurensi yam kwakhona. - Woody Allen.
  • Nokuba isidlo sangokuhlwa sokugqibela esasinokugcwaliswa kweli gumbi. - Woody Allen.
  • Izinto ezimbini azinasiphelo: iphela kunye nobuyatha bomntu; kwaye andiqinisekanga ngendalo iphela. -Albert Einsten.
  • Uhlobo oluhlekisayo yindlela nje emnandi yokuthatha nzulu. - UPeter Ustinov.
  • Izityalo zam zeplastiki zafa kuba ndandingabonakali ndizinkcenkceshela. "Mitch Hedberg."
  • Khange ndithethe nomfazi wam kwiminyaka edlulileyo. Wayengafuni ukumphazamisa. - URodney Dangerfield.
  • Inye kuphela into ethintela uThixo ukuba asithumele omnye umkhukula kukuba eyokuqala ayisebenzi. -Nicholas Chamfort.
  • Imvumelwano ithetha ukuba wonke umntu uyavuma ukuthetha ngokudibeneyo oko akukho mntu ukholelwa kuye. -Abba Eban.
  • Bathi umtshato wenziwa ezulwini. Kodwa nombane kunye neendudumo. - UClint Eastwood.
  • Imali ayizisi lonwabo, kodwa inika uvakalelo olufanayo kangangokuba ufuna ingcali ephezulu kakhulu ukuqinisekisa umahluko. - Woody Allen.
  • Kwakutheni ukuze ndihlale nalo mfazi? Kuba indikhumbuza wena. Ngapha koko, indikhumbuza ngawe ngakumbi kunawe. -Groucho Marx.
  • Imali ibhetele kunobumpofu, nokuba kungenxa yezizathu zemali kuphela. - Woody Allen.
  • Kuthiwa eHollywood kufuneka uhlale uzixolela iintshaba zakho, kuba ngekhe wazi ukuba kuya kufuneka usebenze nini nazo. -Lana Turner.
  • Ukuba ifowuni ayikhali ndim. "UJimmy Buffet."
  • UBigamy unomfazi amaxesha amaninzi. Umntu omnye utshatile. -Oscar Wilde.
  • I-echo ihlala isitsho igama lokugqibela. - Woody Allen.
  • Andivumi ukuba yinxalenye yeklabhu enam njengelungu. -Groucho Marx.
  • Ugqirha wam wezifo zengqondo wandixelela ukuba ndiyaphambana kwaye ndacela uluvo lwesibini. Undixelele ukuba ibimbi nayo. - URodney Dangerfield.
  • Ndijonge ifamily yam ndafumanisa ukuba ndiyile toad - URodney Dangerfield.
  • Ukuzalwa kwam, ndandityala ishumi elinambini leedola. -George S. Kaufman.

Onke la mabinzana ahlekisayo esinokukufumanela wona. Siyathemba ukuba bakwazile ukuqaqambisa usuku lwakho okanye batshintshe indlela oziva ngayo, ukuba bekungalunganga xa uqala ukungena kweli nqaku. Khumbula ukuba ubomi ngaphandle kokuhleka okanye ubabalo ayibubo ubomi.


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