Athi amehlo sisipili somphefumlo, kwaye kuyinyani, kodwa ubuso bubonisa ngokucacileyo ukuba zithini iimvakalelo zakho ngalo mzuzu. Ulwimi lomzimba zizinto ezingezizo zomlomo ezisetyenziswa mihla le kunxibelelwano. Ezi zinto zingathethiyo zibalulekile kunxibelelwano oluhle lwemihla ngemihla. Ukusuka kwimbonakalo yobuso ukuya ekunyakazeni komzimba, izinto ezingathethwanga ... konke oku kunokudlulisa ulwazi oluninzi. Imbonakalo yobuso iya kuthetha ngaphezulu kunokuba ucinga.
Ulwimi lomzimba akhawunti 50-70% lonke unxibelelwano. Ukuqonda ulwimi lomzimba kubalulekile, kwaye kubalulekile ukuba unikele ingqalelo kwezinye iimpawu, ezinje ngemeko ozifumana ukuyo. Ulwimi lwamabinzana alula lubalulekile njengawo wonke umzimba, Ufuna ukwazi okungakumbi? Ungalahli iinkcukacha!
Imbonakalo yobuso
Ngaba ukhe wacinga ngayo yonke into umntu anokuyidlulisa ngokujonga nje ubuso? Uncumo lunokudlulisa ukuvunywa okanye ukonwaba. Xa umntu efingile inokuba luphawu lokungamkeleki okanye ukungonwabi. Ngamanye amaxesha, ukubonakala kobuso kunokubonisa iimvakalelo eziyinyani malunga nemeko ethile, nokuba azihambi ngokwamazwi ... Nokuba uthi uziva ulungile, ubuso bakho bunokubonisa okwahlukileyo.
Eminye yemizekelo eyimizekelo yeemvakalelo ezibonakaliswa bubuso inokuba: ulonwabo, usizi, umsindo, ukumangaliswa, ukukruquka, uloyiko, ukudideka, indelelo, umnqweno, njl.
Imbonakalo yobuso bomntu inokukunceda ukuba ubone ukuba siyayithemba okanye siyakholelwa into ayithethayo loo mntu. Olunye uphononongo lufumanise ukuba imbonakalo yobuso ethembekileyo ibandakanya ukunyuka okuncinci kumashiya kunye noncumo oluncinci. Eli binzana, abaphandi bacebise, lidlulisa ubuhlobo kunye nokuzithemba.
Imbonakalo yobuso ikwayenye yeendlela zokuthetha komzimba. Amagama asetyenzisiweyo ukubonisa ukoyika, umsindo, usizi kunye nolonwabo ziyafana kwihlabathi liphela. Umphandi uPaul Ekman ufumene iintlobo ezahlukeneyo zobuso ezinxulumene neemvakalelo ezithile kubandakanya uvuyo, umsindo, uloyiko, ukothuka kunye nosizi. Uphando lwakhe lucebisa ukuba senze izigwebo malunga nobukrelekrele babantu ngokubhekisele kubuso nakwinkangeleko yabo. Olunye uphononongo lufumanise ukuba abantu abanobuso obuncinci kunye neempumlo ezibalaseleyo kunokwenzeka ukuba babonwa njengabanengqondo. Abantu abanoncumo kwaye bonwabile bathetha ukuba bakrelekrele kunabo banomsindo okanye bathetha kakhulu.
Amehlo
Njengoko besitshilo ekuqaleni kweli nqaku, amehlo sisipili somphefumlo kuba banakho ukutyhila okuninzi malunga nendlela umntu aziva ngayo okanye acinga ngayo. Xa uncokola nomnye umntu, ukuthathela ingqalelo intshukumo yamehlo yinxalenye yendalo kwaye ibalulekile kwinkqubo yonxibelelwano. Ezinye zezinto eziqhelekileyo onokuthi uziqaphele zibandakanya ukuba abantu bajongana ngamehlo ngqo okanye bajonge kude, bangakanani na ukukhanya ngamehlo, okanye ukuba abafundi babo bahlile. Xa uvavanya ulwimi lomzimba, nikela ingqalelo kwezi zinto zilandelayo:
- Jonga isingenisi. Xa umntu ejonge ngqo emehlweni akho ngelixa ethetha, oku kubonisa ukuba banomdla kwaye banikele ingqalelo. Nangona kunjalo, ukudibana ixesha elide kunokwenza omnye umntu azive esongelwa okanye esoyika. Kwelinye icala, ukuqhawula amehlo kunye nokujonga kude rhoqo kunokubonisa ukuba umntu uphazamisekile, akonwabanga, okanye uzama ukufihla ezona mvakalelo zakhe.
- Ukudanyaza. Ukuqhwanyaza yinto yendalo efunekayo ukugcina amehlo akho ethanjisiwe. Ukuqwalaselwa kufuneka kuhlawulwe nokuba umntu uqhwanyaza kakhulu okanye umncinci kakhulu. Abantu abaqhwanyaza ngokukhawuleza benza njalo xa beziva bekhathazekile okanye bengonwabanga. Ukuqhwanyaza rhoqo kunokubonisa ukuba umntu uzama ngabom ukulawula iintshukumo zamehlo. Umzekelo, umdlali we-poker usenokuqhwanyaza kaninzi kuba uzama ukubonakala engonwabanga malunga nesandla asifumeneyo.
- Ukwanda komfundi. Ubungakanani bomfundi inokuba sesona silumkileyo kwaye singazibandakanyi nonxibelelwano ngomlomo. Ngelixa amanqanaba okukhanya kulawulo lokungqonge umfundi, iimvakalelo ngamanye amaxesha zinokubangela utshintsho oluncinci kubungakanani bomfundi ngokunjalo. Amehlo ajikeleze kakhulu, umzekelo, angabonisa ukuba umntu unomdla okanye unemincili xa ejonge omnye umntu.
Umlomo
Umlomo ukwathetha kakhulu ngabantu kwaye kuxhomekeke kwiintshukumo zabo banokubonisa into ethile okanye enye. Ukuthetha kunye nokuhamba komlomo kunokuba yinto ebalulekileyo xa kufundwa ulwimi lomzimba. Umzekelo, ukuluma umlomo ongezantsi kunokubonisa ukuba umntu uziva enexhala, uloyiko okanye ukungazithembi.
Ukugquma umlomo wakho kunokuba ngumzamo wokuba uziphathe kakuhle xa umntu ezamla okanye ekhohlela, kodwa inokuba lilinge lokufihla isenzo esingavumiyo. Ukuncuma yenye yezona zinto zilungileyo zomzimba, kodwa uncumo lunokutolikwa ngeendlela ezininzi. Uncumo lunokuba lolokwenene, okanye lungasetyenziselwa ukubonisa ulonwabo olungeyonyani, impoxo, okanye kwanokugxeka.
Xa uvavanya ulwimi lomzimba, kuya kufuneka uthathele ingqalelo le miqondiso ilandelayo ephuma emlonyeni nasemilebeni ukuze uqonde ngokupheleleyo ukuba yeyiphi eyona ntsingiselo yomntu ovelisa loo miqondiso. Khumbula ukuba umxholo kufuneka uthathelwe ingqalelo.
- Qinisa imilebe yakho. Ukubetha imilebe yakho kungabonakalisa ukungathandi, ukunganyaniseki, ukungavumi, okanye ukungathembani.
- Ukuluma imilebe. Abantu ngamanye amaxesha bayaluma imilomo yabo ngenxa yokuba bexhalabile, bexhalabile, okanye bexinezelekile.
- Vala umlomo wakho. Xa abantu befuna ukufihla indlela abavakalelwa ngayo, banokuyivala imilomo yabo ukunqanda uncumo lwabo okanye nayiphi na imvakalelo abangafuni ukuba abanye bayazi.
- Kancinci tshintsha emlonyeni Xa kukho utshintsho oluncinci emlonyeni banokuba zizalathiso ezifihlakeleyo zendlela umntu aziva ngayo. Xa umlomo uphakanyisiwe kancinci, oko kunokuthetha ukuba umntu uziva onwabile okanye unethemba. Kwelinye icala, umlomo othe tyaba kancinci unokuba sisalathiso sosizi, ukungavumi, okanye nokuba yinto nje emdaka.
Okwangoku, uyazi ukuba yintoni umahluko phakathi kweemvakalelo kunye neemvakalelo?