Ukusondela kukaKhisimusi kuyimpicabadala engokwengqondo. UKhisimusi uyiholide lapho imizwa yenjabulo kufanele ibuse khona kakhulu. Noma kunjalo, umzamo onzima wokujabula ngalezi zinsuku ungakhathaza. Kunzima ukujabula lapho uphuthelwa umuntu omthandayo noma ngenkathi udla nalowo mlamu awugwinyi.
Izazi zokusebenza kwengqondo ziseluleka ukuthi sicabange okuhle kepha kwesinye isikhathi lokhu kungabuyela emuva. Kufana nokuthi bakutshele ukuthi ungacabangi ngebhere elimhlophe. Lapho uzama ngokwengeziwe, kulapho kuvela ibhere elimhlophe.
Kungani izakhamizi zamazwe angaphephile kwezomnotho zivame ukubika inkomba ephakeme yenjabulo? Akukho abangakulahla, sebesazi vele isimo esibi kakhulu.
Iphayona lendlela "engeyinhle" kwakungudokotela wezifo zengqondo u-Albert Ellis (owashona ngo-2007). Wathola futhi umqondo osemqoka wezazi zefilosofi zamaStoyiku zaseGrisi naseRoma lasendulo: kwesinye isikhathi, indlela engcono yokubhekana nekusasa elingaqinisekile ukugxila kokungcono kakhulu, kepha okubi kakhulu.
Ukuze anqobe ukwesaba amahloni, u-Ellis weluleka amakhasimende akhe ukuthi agibele esitimeleni saseNew York futhi akhulume amagama eziteshi ngokuzwakalayo lapho edlula kuzo. Iziguli zakhe bekunzima kodwa zikutholile lokho ukwesaba kwakhe kwaba nehaba: akekho owasho lutho kubo, bathola ukubukeka okungajwayelekile kuphela.
AmaStoyiku enza inqubo ebizwa ngokuthi "Ukuhlelwa kobubi": Bacabange ngayo yonke imininingwane yesimo esibi kakhulu esinciphise kakhulu ukukhathazeka kwabo.
Isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo uJulie Norem silinganisela ukuthi cishe ingxenye eyodwa kwezintathu yabantu baseMelika basebenzisa leli su abalibizayo "Ukuphelelwa ithemba". Ukucabanga okuhle, ngakolunye uhlangothi, ngumzamo wokuziqinisekisa ukuthi izinto zizohamba kahle, okungaqinisa inkolelo yokuthi kungaba kubi impela uma izinto zingahambi kahle.
Ezinkampanini zaseMelika, imfundiso eyamukelwa kabanzi yiyona "inkolo yokulindela okuhle." Ukubaluleka kokubeka izinhloso ezinkulu, ezinesibindi zenhlangano kanye nabasebenzi kuyakhuthazwa (noma kuphoqelelwe) ukusetha izinhloso "ezihlakaniphile": ezithile, ezilinganisekayo, ezifinyelelekayo, ezifanele futhi ezifika ngesikhathi.
Kodwa-ke, lokhu kulungiswa kwemigomo sekuqala ukwembuleka. Ngesikhathi kwenziwa ucwaningo olwenziwe ngalolu daba, kwaxoxwa nosomabhizinisi abaphumelelayo abangama-45. Cishe akekho owenze izinhlelo zebhizinisi eziphelele noma wenza ucwaningo olunzulu lwezimakethe.
Abanye babo bacabange isimo esibi kunazo zonke. Esikhundleni sokugxila ekutholeni kwemiklomelo emangazayo yenkampani yakho, babala ukuthi izindleko zemali zesinqumo esibi zizoba yini. Uma ukulahleka okungaba khona kwakubekezeleleka, benza isinqumo.
Iphuzu lalokhu kucabanga okungalungile akukhona ukuvusa imizwa ejabulisayo noma ukuphishekela impumelelo. Imayelana nokuba ngokoqobo ngokwamukela iqiniso lokuthi ikusasa aliqinisekile nokuthi le mpilo kunezimanga ezingenakugwemeka, zombili ezinhle nezimbi.
Amandla okucabanga okungafanele abaluleke kakhulu lapho sikhuluma ngeqiniso lokuphila elingenakugwemeka: ukufa. Enye yemishwana edume kakhulu kaSteve Jobs ihlobene nalesi sici:
Ukukhumbula ukuthi uzokufa kuyindlela engcono kakhulu engazi ngayo ukugwema isicupho sokucabanga ukuthi kukhona okuzokulahlekela.
Noma kunjalo, singalingeka ukuthi sivumelane nakho Isikhundla sikaWoody Allen ngokufa:
"Ngimelene kakhulu naye."
Ngicabanga ukuthi kungcono kakhulu ukubhekana nakho kunokukugwema. Kunamaqiniso athile empilweni ngisho nomqondo omuhle kakhulu onamandla ongeke uwaguqule.
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