I have no friends, what can I do?

a photo of friends

Friends are the chosen family, we spend a lot of time with them and their friendship makes us feel happier and more positive. Having friends is very important in people's lives and when they don't have them, maybe something is wrong. People are social beings and when we do not have friends the feeling of deep loneliness is heightened by creating a certain agony in the heart.

It does not take many friends to be happy, in fact, in relation to friendships, quality is always better than quantity. Few but true friends can make a difference in the emotional well-being of anyone. A true friend will be by your side when you need him. Although there are friends who can come and go in your life, there will always be some who will stand by your side, no matter what.

If you don't have friends, it may be your fault

But what happens when you don't have friends? Why does it seem like no one wants to have you as a friend? There may be many or no reasons, but directly or indirectly the reality is that if you don't have friends, it's up to you. This reality is harsh but you need to be aware of it to remedy it as soon as possible.

friends having something in a bar

Perhaps you console yourself by thinking that it is others who do not want to approach you, But in reality, you probably have an invisible concrete wall that is not allowed to access you for whatever reason.

Perhaps as a child you moved frequently and did not have the opportunity to have real friends because you had to fit in quickly and then you left without being able to put down roots anywhere. In adolescence, trust and loyalty are very important and it is difficult to have friends when you see that not everyone is related to you. It is better to have few and real friends than to have thousands of friends on Facebook who are really nobody in your life.

It is important to be aware of all this so that you can know the exact reason why you do not have friends and to be able to remedy it; Don't you talk to others? Do you have a too shy personality? Do you think talking to others is a waste of time? Do you really want friends or are you better off in your solitude?

Friendships change as you get older. If you do not have friends and are middle-aged, it is probably because you are too critical or negative. Let people feel tired or bad about themselves, but don't let it affect you too much. If you are too critical or complain about everything, people will not want to be by your side because you will be transmitting bad energy to them.

People like to be with others who make them feel good, who remind them that they are important and special. If in a friendship the good intentions are not reciprocal, this friendship simply disappears.

friends selfie

What to do if you want to have more friends

If you want to have friends and also keep them, it is recommended that you do not be too critical. Criticism is useless because it puts the other person on the defensive and he will not want to go out of his way to justify himself. Criticism is dangerous when it comes to friendships because it hurts people's pride, it hurts the sense of importance and arouses resentment ... and all this is too far to achieve a good friendship.

You have to be honest to have friends, but To be honest you will have to do it with diplomacy, assertiveness and a lot of empathy. If the other person feels good when you talk to them, even if what you say is not entirely to their liking, they may appreciate your honesty. Actually, if you are a person who believes that the truth should always come first, then count the friends you have… Sometimes, to maintain friendships you have to be honest and make up a bit of reality. If you attack other people you will be directly spoiling the friendship.

Friendships also require perseverance and work to maintain them. It is like a plant that you are taking care of so that it is beautiful: if you do not water it, nothing will die and if you water it too much it will also die. You must find a way to water it so that it can grow healthy and strong. Friendships are the same, you must find the balance so that the friendship continues to grow.

friends watching tv

It is important to ask friends how they are, really listen and talk, be interested in what they do or think, remember important dates such as birthdays, be by their side in difficult times or problems they may have ... And of course, this interaction must be two-way, it makes no sense if you care about a person who shows no interest in you.

Sometimes, there are people who do not have friends because they do not read non-verbal signals well, body language has a great importance in terms of people's friendships. Perhaps you have ever thought that other people do not like you just because they do not smile at you and without realizing it you hate them even before you have exchanged a word with that person. Smiling at another person is the first step to a beautiful friendship, because a smile brings others closer and makes them feel warm by your side.

friends together

How to find friends

To find friends you can look for them in places you frequent but without forcing the situations. Nobody wants friends by force, you need to be natural all the time. It can be at your job, in a park, in your place of study ... to create a true friendship you will have to think about things you have in common to be able to start a conversation and not fall into too trivial topics of conversation. Communication is essential to build a friendship.

To talk to others you will have to be pleasant, empathetic, assertive and not be a fake person. Do not try to please others by being what you are not because then you will not like anyone. You must be authentic.

Friendship is for those who are not afraid to smile first, of reaching out to those who need it without asking for anything in return, of those people who say good morning with enthusiasm in the morning and who worry about you in the afternoon. A friendship is not born overnight, it is a matter of time, respect and trust, in addition to having some chemistry with the other person ... Without chemistry, there is nothing.


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  1.   HECTOR ZABALA RUIZ said

    I appreciate your comments, because at the moment I consider myself that I do not have friends, I do not know if it is because of me or because I have been closed to friendship. But these comments that I read today have opened a new path for me. Thank you

  2.   Rachel Manrique Flores said

    I share with everything I read on this page regarding friendship, I know that after our family having friends is very healthy, but having friends is not very easy, you have to look for them very carefully
    And knowing how to be a friend is also important, this friendship is very delicate, but if necessary.