The concept of attachment refers to the emotional bond that is formed between human beings, generally between parents and the child during the first years of life. This link is important since it will influence in the way people perceive and relate to others throughout life. Thanks to various studies and research, different types of attachment have been identified.
Secure attachment is the ideal, although there are also types of insecure attachment, which can have important consequences on relationships between people. In the following article we are going to talk to you about the different types of insecure attachment and How they can affect relationships.
Avoidant attachment
Avoidant attachment is characterized primarily by a lack of desire for emotional intimacy and a tendency to give little importance to interpersonal relationships. People with an avoidant attachment style tend to remain emotionally distant and may feel somewhat uncomfortable having to depend on others. This is largely because in the past they did not receive the necessary emotional support from parents or were rejected when they expressed their needs.
Regarding the main characteristics of this type of attachment in relationships, they are the following:
- Difficulty to maintain intimate and lasting relationships.
- They avoid commitments emotional type.
- Trend to distance in the face of relationships that become close.
- Fear of emotional dependence.
- Need to maintain certain controll above all emotions.
- They appear a lack of security because they do not connect with their emotions.
Anxious-ambivalent attachment
Anxious-ambivalent attachment is characterized by excessive concern about rejection from others and the constant need for validation. People who have this type of attachment may experience strong anxiety about the state of their relationships. This may be largely because attention and affection were unpredictable during infancy.
A person who suffers from this type of attachment has this series of characteristics:
- Difficulty to regulate your emotions.
- He seems insecure in relationships with others.
- Suffers from low self-esteem and They have little self-confidence.
- Urgent need to be in contact with your partner, both physically and emotionally.
Disorganized attachment
Disorganized insecure attachment is the most complex and problematic type of all types of insecure attachment. It is mainly characterized by a combination of disorganized behaviors in interpersonal relationships. This type of attachment is usually related to traumatic or abusive experiences in childhood, where the parents themselves represented a source of fear or danger.
Regarding the main characteristics of disorganized attachment, they are the following:
- Feeling of conflict in relationships with others.
- Difficulty when trust other people.
- serious problems of conduct and behavior.
- Instability on an emotional level and not very predictable on a day-to-day basis.
- Mental health problems such as personality disorder.
What are the causes of insecure attachment?
The causes of insecure attachment can be complex, and are often due to a combination of genetic, environmental and relational factors. The affection received from parents will play a crucial role in the formation of secure or insecure attachment. Lack of affection, physical or emotional abuse, and lack of emotional availability on the part of parents can contribute to the development of an insecure attachment.
In addition to this, genetic and temperamental factors can also influence the development of insecure attachment. Some people may have a certain biological predisposition to be more sensitive or reactive to attachment signals, which can interact with the environment to give rise to different types of attachment.
What are the consequences of insecure attachment
Insecure attachment can have numerous negative implications for a person's emotional well-being and interpersonal relationships. People with insecure attachments can experience serious difficulties to establish and maintain intimate and satisfying relationships. They may have difficulty regulating their emotions and are more likely to develop mental health problems, such as depression, anxiety, and personality disorders.
In addition to all this, insecure attachment can also have a certain impact on other aspects of life, such as academic and work performance, self-esteem, and the ability to cope with daily stress. Therefore, it is key to address insecure attachment experiences in a comprehensive way, providing the resources necessary to promote emotional well-being and healthy relationships.
How to treat insecure attachment
If the person suffers from this type of attachment, it is important to put themselves in the hands of a good therapist who knows how to solve this problem. Said professional must provide the necessary guidelines so that the patient is able to overcome such kind of attachment and can achieve a certain emotional well-being and happiness in your daily life. The therapist's role can be described in five important points:
- Provide some security to the patient.
- Help the patient when relating to others.
- Use individual therapy as base for the process.
- Connect present behavior with those experiences from the past that could have caused them.
- Question the validity the way you see yourself, others and your own relationships.
In short, the different types or classes of insecure attachment will reflect the complexities of early relationships and the strong impact they will have. in emotional and social development. Recognizing and understanding these types of attachment can provide a much deeper understanding of an individual's past experiences and their emotional needs in the present. At the same time, it will also offer opportunities that will allow you to provide the necessary support to promote much safer and more satisfying relationships in the future.