Life is full of disappointments. Being disappointed by something that happens to you is the most normal thing in the world, as long as you know how to handle it and that you can learn from that experience. There is a popular phrase that goes like this: "When you learn to accept instead of waiting, you will have fewer disappointments" ... there is much to learn from these wise words!
In this sense, you should know that if there is something predictable in life, it is that you will feel disappointed in some way. It can happen with your parents, with your teachers, with your classmates, with your friends, with your coworkers, with the circumstances of life ... There are many times that you can feel disappointed and in the vast majority, it may is caused by factors external to you. A betrayal is usually a fairly common source of disappointment.
Things happen ...
There are those who think that in order not to be disappointed you do not have to have expectations, but it is quite difficult not to have them when you live in a world so demanding that it only wants you to respond. Perhaps you are expected to always do the "right thing" and to strive to achieve your goals.
When you prepare to hope for the best and you do not have it, it will be when you are disappointed and do not understand why it is happening to you. Disappointment triggers a physiological response in your brain. You feel like you have a tendency to depression, you become apathetic, and you have difficulty feeling motivated. Your brain prevents you from being well ... but it is your choice to remain in disappointment or move on.
Things happen, think about what happened ... You cannot influence it or change what has happened. It is true that you can reflect on what has happened to you and learn from mistakes or what has not gone well. You can think about what you could have done and what not, but it is important that you accept what happened because the reality is that you have been disappointed.
The key to dealing with disappointment is not letting it affect you in the future, not blocking you, and not stopping you from being the person you want to be. Do not hide behind the fear of being disappointed again, because you will have these feelings again. You must learn to deal with them so that in the future, they are a lesson rather than a punishment.
Your perspective is key
If you feel a big disappointment, put a positive spin on all that. Take a step back and look at what has happened to you as if you had a chair on the Moon… everything looks smaller and less important! Feeling disappointed is unpleasant but seeing reality is a must. Maybe you have high standards and expectations of yourself. You chased something and it didn't work out for one reason or another. This could be seen as a learning opportunity, to refocus and improve.
When people are disappointed they become bitter and hope that everything will change on its own. This does not happen, if you want changes you have to move ... at least change your thinking! Disappointment has to teach you that you can go after what you really want, understand what has happened and learn from the experience, making peace with it!
Accept that disappointment is part of life
Disappointment is part of life, it is something that happens to everyone in the world and it will also happen to you. It is important and useful for you that you begin to normalize the situation… there is nothing wrong with experiencing disappointment! Although it causes you unpleasant emotions at first, but you can learn from the circumstances.
No one goes through life without feeling disappointed. Some people experience bigger disappointments than others, but everyone experiences it to a greater or lesser extent. Accept these feelings and do not want to run away from them ... all emotions are necessary to understand life and know if you should change something or not.
Change your internal dialogue
To overcome and deal with disappointment, you need to change your victim mindset and work towards a growth mindset. A victim mentality will leave you anchored in that everything bad happens to you. Instead, a growth mindset will help you change your perspective and realize that with effort and a good attitude, life can be a much more pleasant place, even if you have to experience disappointments.
One way to start doing this is by changing your internal dialogue. Instead of talking to yourself like this is the worst thing that could happen to you, change your language to something more powerful (but still true): "It happened and now I need to figure out my next steps." Or "Having disappointments is normal and this is not going to prevent me from moving forward." Or thoughts like: “I'm disappointed, but who tells me I should stay at that? I can do something different right now if I choose. "
If you ever find yourself saying negative things like, "I can't go on like this," allow those phrases to be the trigger to voluntarily push yourself to have a more positive conversation with yourself. If you do it every day, you will be able to realize all the benefits it will give you in life.
Do the best you can with a plan!
Once you accept that there can be many disappointments in life, then you can be strong enough to have a plan. This is a way to move forward when you feel disappointed or stuck in something important in your life.
It is not necessary to make big plans, just know what steps to take to feel better emotionally and know that this is the best way for you. Remember that sometimes the best way doesn't even mean it's the easiest, it can even scare you a bit ... but in the long run, it will be the best decision made.
Start by taking small steps, confidently moving in the direction that makes you feel best at any given moment. That way you will know that you are not making a mistake. Set a goal that you want to achieve and just walk towards it! Experiencing some form of achievement can send the message to your mind and your emotions that you can do it, so go ahead and do it! And what if you get disappointed again? That you will have to learn from the experience and walk again!