Not everyone knows what it's like to go into a wrathful state. Anger is an emotion that should not be repressed because it is part of us, but ... you must learn to channel it, understand when it appears in order to manage it and above all, understand why anger is necessary. In this way we can accept the emotion and we can control it, instead of emotion controlling us.
Anger is a human emotion that, as we have told you in the previous paragraph, is normal for it to appear and is even natural and healthy. The problem is when it gets out of control and turns into destructive anger. Destructive anger causes problems in the environment of the emotionally uncontrolled person (at all levels).
If you do not control your anger, you may feel that you are at its mercy, at the mercy of an unpredictable but very powerful emotion. In this sense, it is important that you take into account what anger is, why it happens and control and overcoming strategies.
The wrath
Anger is a very intense emotion that ranges from slight irritation to great rages. Anger is accompanied by physiological changes that will help you to recognize when it appears ... for example, when you get angry, your heart rate and blood pressure rise as well as your hormones, such as cortisol, adrenaline, and norepinephrine.
Anger can appear at any time and without warning if you allow it to control you. It can be caused by external and internal factors, by someone or something, by worries, by memories, etc. Things don't really piss you off, you piss off you because you allow that emotion to take over you.
Express anger
It's okay to feel anger, but you can't allow it to take over your being. You decide how you want to act in the face of such intense emotion. You also decide how to express it. Anger is a natural and adaptive response to what feels like a threat, it inspires powerful and sometimes aggressive feelings and behaviors that allow us to fight and defend ourselves in case we feel that we are being attacked. In this sense, It is worth noting that a certain amount of anger is necessary for survival, But too much can make our lives have consequences.
It is necessary to maintain control because we cannot attack or harm every person or thing that annoys us or ignites our irritation. We must follow common sense, social norms and understand that anger tells us what happens to us but we should not act with it by controlling ourselves.
For the expression of anger it is important to accept it in order to calm it. Expressing feelings assertively and non-aggressively is essential for healthy expression of anger and rage. To achieve this, you need to be very clear about your needs and how you have to satisfy them without hurting others or yourself.
Being assertive does not mean being aggressive or demanding; It means being respectful to yourself and others. Anger can be accepted and then converted or redirected. This happens when you maintain your anger, stop thinking about it, and focus on something positive.
The goal is to turn all that anger into something more productive. The danger in this type of response is that if external expression is not allowed, your anger can turn internal, and it attacks yourself. Inward anger can cause hypertension, high blood pressure, or depression. You can also have pathological expressions of anger such as passive aggressive behaviors or have a permanently hostile and cynical personality.
People who constantly put others down, criticize everything, and make cynical comments have not learned to constructively express their anger. Not surprisingly, they don't have many successful relationships… But the good news is that you can defuse that anger. You can control your external behavior But you can also calm your internal responses and thus improve your physical and mental health.
You can control your anger
The good news is that if you want, you can really control your anger… you just have to do a little bit of your part and you will have control of those emotions that sometimes you think become uncontrollable. Don't miss the following tips:
- Relaxation. Relaxation is the strategy par excellence and it is as simple as taking a deep breath. You can do it with techniques found on the Internet or YouTube videos or simply by taking deep breaths sometimes when you feel that anger is about to explode within your being.
- Cognitive restructuring. Simply put, this means changing the way you think. Angry people tend to curse, curse, or speak in highly derogatory terms that reflect their inner thoughts. When you are angry, your thinking can be very exaggerated and too dramatic. Try to replace these thoughts with more rational ones.
- Problem resolution. Sometimes anger and frustration are caused by real problems and then, it is necessary to find solutions to calm our emotional state. But remember, if you can't change the situation, why are you going to be angry? But don't have an all or nothing thought ... sometimes solving problems requires seeing the conflict from different points of view.
- Better comunication. An angry person usually acts before reasoning something that will always generate conflicts. In this sense, it is better that if you have a heated conversation with someone, stop short and think clearly about what other people are saying, taking the necessary time before responding. Staying calm is always the basis to prevent anger from taking over your being.
- Think about your surroundings. If your immediate environment is what causes you irritation and anger, such as problems and responsibilities ... then in a moment when you feel that anger begins to take over you, it will be when you will have to change the scene to find calm and take a deep breath . Give yourself a break whenever you need it, have your own time.