How to Control Anger or Anger Effectively

It is very common for psychologists to present people who do not know how to control anger, anger or anger; even finding professionals who specialize in this area. Since it is a fairly common problem, we wanted to talk about it and explain some tips that will surely help you or someone you know.

Know what anger means

Before understanding how to control anger, we must know the meaning of anger and its causes.

Anger or rage is defined as an emotion, which is expressed through irritability. This modifies the behavior both physically and cognitively, which considerably affects the person who feels it. According to research, anger is also defined as a series of behaviors in order to show an aggressor to stop his threats.

The main problem and for which we must control the anger, rage or fury, is that while a person is in that state, he loses his ability to be objective and understand the consequences of his actions. For that reason, most of the time when someone has an anger problem, they can say or do things without thinking and then regret it.

What are the causes of Anger?

Among the causes of anger we can find injustice, pain, fear and frustration. 

• Injustice, for example, could be when someone violates our rights.
• Pain can be of many types, but it is usually when we are hurt emotionally.
• The fear would be when we are afraid of something that is going to happen.
• The frustration on their part would be when they reject our behavior.

Anger usually happens in three cases. The first is frustrating situations, which can be when we don't achieve our goals; the second is the one already mentioned about injustice and the third is when we do not receive the reward for a learned behavior, for example, by not receiving the treat after having placed the coin in the vending machine.

Know the symptoms of anger

Rabies has two types of symptoms, the passive and aggressive.

• Passive anger can have several symptoms, such as losing passion, predisposing yourself to failure, mental manipulation, blaming yourself, developing obsessive behaviors, and avoiding all kinds of conflicts.
• On the other hand, aggressive anger has symptoms such as vulnerability of feelings, developing hatred towards people or things and trying to encourage conditions.

Top tips for managing anger effectively

Once we have understood what is anger, its causes and symptoms in individuals who suffer from it (which in reality we can all suffer from it at some point); now we will mention some ways of control anger for those people who usually have anger problems.

Preventing the build-up of anger to control anger

If we add episodes of anger by not reacting to adverse situations such as the causes described above, little by little we will accumulate this anger within us. This can be seen as an effective way to control anger attacks at specific times. However, by not reacting and accumulating anger, we will be hurting ourselves inside and increasing the possibility of 'exploding' at any moment; which usually happens with the least indicated people, for example, with our partner when problems are caused by work.

Don't think that there is always a winner and a loser

Sometimes we believe that there are only two sides: the winners and the losers. This problem is quite common, since by not being able to exceed or reach our goals; we can feel like we are failures or losers. In order to control anger, you must learn to accept that you don't always win and that when you lose, sometimes you win more.

Rest and relax is necessary

It is extremely necessary for a person to get enough rest to avoid irritability. To do this, you must organize your life to be able to sleep on a normal schedule that allows you to recover from the fatigue caused by your daily activities. All bodies are different, so depending on it and the activities carried out during the day, each person will have a period of hours necessary to fully recover.

On the other hand, acquire relaxation habits like meditating can effectively help to control anger. A great option is practice yoga, the already mentioned meditation or mindfulness. As well as trying to perform self-control techniques that allows them to regain reason at the time of a fit of rage.

Control anger by reflecting on the consequences

A person suffering from outbursts of anger is usually unaware of the consequences of your actions; because these are carried out in said attack. However, when the water calms down, they tend to forget what caused it and the actions committed.

When a person is aware of what he did or said, then episodes of regret come. The problem is that they tend to forget you quickly or believe that an apology is enough to fix the problem; when in fact they need to pay attention to their mental health and try to correct or control their anger, either alone or with the help of a therapist (which is our recommendation, as it will provide you with the necessary tools to deal with the problem effectively ).

Control anger by avoiding going places or talking to problem people

If we are aware that we do not like a site or a person who can irritate us; it is best to avoid them. Because if not, then we have a great chance of not being able to control anger effectively.

There are places we cannot stand, as well as "toxic people" that are often unpleasant to everyone. In the first case, depending on the place, we may or may not be able to avoid it; while the second, being a person, we can chat with her to establish conditions and thus avoid future problems.

The best option is to go to the psychologist

Although it is appreciated that you are looking online for a way to control anger, the best option is always to treat yourself with a therapist who specializes in the area. Many times mental problems can be caused by causes of which we are not aware; while psychologists have studied the mental area very well to be able to determine most of our ailments.

For that reason, we recommend that you go to a specialist in the area in case you cannot control your anger.. However, we anticipate that any decision you make (try it on your own or go to the psychologist) you will need willpower and perseverance to really achieve a change.