It is more than likely that sometime in your life you have made excuses for not doing something that you were supposed to do in principle. It is also more than certain that someone has made an excuse at some point for the same thing.
Excuses are like white lies that are told, without really bad intentions, but that can become an ingrained habit that will bring you serious problems in the future. If you use excuses too much, people will start not to trust you.
We all have a friend who is always late or one who complains that it is too difficult to lose weight. Who has not heard of that person who is so busy that he does not have time to meet his friends? Really, if your destiny is in your hands, why do you focus on making excuses all the time? Are you lying to yourself to rationalize your excuse or do you really believe what you are saying to others?
When you make excuses, you are literally excusing yourself from that situation. But wouldn't it be better to face reality and face it in a mature way? Why is it preferred to do so? Surely, if you face what you are excusing, you could lead a better and more satisfying life… So why is it so tempting to make excuses?
If you let go of a task or goal that seems difficult to you, the negative relief immediately afterwards reinforces that the excuse you made was a good decision. This will justify the excuse and since you will feel good when you use it, it is more than likely that you will repeat that behavior in the future. The way to stop this reinforcement is to understand exactly what you are really saying when you make excuses and try to change that behavior. To understand it, read on.
Inertia overtakes you
You can make empty promises to yourself all the time. When a new year begins, many people make decisions and later, they make excuses for not keeping them. This happens because if you promise to start exercising or eating well but there is no real change in you, when the routine begins ... everything stagnates. Without realizing it, inertia begins to overcome you because it is more comfortable for you to continue with your old habits and you excuse yourself to do the same thing again and again. Although if you always do the same ... you will never have changes!
Are you afraid
There are many things that you can be scared of when a change is coming ... and sometimes, you may not even be aware of what is happening to you. Maybe you are afraid of your doubts, of the risks you should take for that change ... OR not knowing what might be the result of efforts for that change.
Underneath all of that is the fear that you might fail, be rejected, be judged as weak by others, end up in unacceptable circumstances, or make a mistake. Some of us are even afraid that we can succeed, and we have to deal with the envy of others. These are uncomfortable feelings! So we make an excuse to avoid them ...
You don't have enough motivation
What motivates you more: the carrot or the stick? The prospect of your reward when you've successfully made your change: greater health and well-being, more joy at work, a better life? Or the fear of negative consequences if you don't change: gaining weight and developing a related illness, stress at work, or dying of regret?
Many people are more internally motivated and others are not. Usually the greatest incentive and motivator to change is pain or the stress of a situation you are in at a certain time. Until you have reached a level that is almost unbearable ... you will stay where you are and make excuses not to change.
The consequences in your life of making excuses
Living a life full of excuses can have dire and long-lasting consequences. Excuses will not only prevent you from reaching your full potential, but they will also prevent you from recognizing opportunities, strengths and abilities you may have to help you overcome common problems in everyday life. If you don't challenge yourself to reach new goals, you will never really know what you are really capable of.
New opportunities lurk around every corner ... However, you will never find them if you get tangled up with endless excuses. If you persistently make excuses, then you may succumb to the following consequences:
- Lack of responsibility and growth
- Self-limited beliefs about yourself
- Continual regrets
- Habitual thoughts of "what if ..." "What if ..."
- Pessimistic view of life
- Bad judgment when making critical decisions.
- Paranoias that prevent you from taking decisive action
- You will not get out of your comfort zone
- Blocking your proactive ability and creativity
These consequences certainly do not result in a very satisfying lifestyle. In fact, they paralyze us and prevent advancement in all areas of our lives. To get over your excuses, you must first admit that you are creating them in the first place. This can, of course, be difficult. However, it is absolutely necessary if you want to avoid succumbing to the inevitable consequences. Ask yourself the following questions to ponder this question:
- What excuses do you usually make?
- Why do you settle?
- Why do you make excuses?
- Then list the consequences of making excuses and ask yourself questions like:
- Are these excuses keeping me from moving forward?
- How do excuses impair your ability to get what you want?
Once you reflect on all this, you will realize the importance of doing your part so that in this way, your life improves instead of getting worse.
Types of common excuses
There are some that are quite common and are usually worn, do any of them sound familiar to you?
- I have no time
- I can not, I'm sorry
- I don't have money to do that
- I am too old (or too young)
- I don't know how to do it, I can't help you
- I'm like that and I can't change
- What if i'm wrong? I'd rather not try
- Now is not the right time
- Is better to wait
- I'm not going to risk it because it won't work
- I'm just not good enough
- It's not you, it's Me
- I will do it later