Cynicism is quite present in society today, but it is necessary to identify it to avoid being poisoned by your thoughts. A cynical person will always know what to say when others have to solve the problem, but they will not be able to really lift a finger. They are also usually sarcastic people trying to show themselves intellectually superior than other people.
In reality they are hiding their lack of moral or ethical foundation on which their behavior is based. They try to deceive and find it difficult to admit that they are wrong. They use sarcasm and black humor to avoid consequences of their behavior, at least in the short term.
The dangers of cynicism
A 2009 study published on ahajournals.org followed more than 97.000 women and showed that women who were more optimistic had lower rates of coronary heart disease, cancer-related deaths, and ultimately, less mortality. Conversely, women with the most pessimistic and cynical personalities had higher rates of these illnesses and death. When we think that the hostility and negativity are life-threatening conditions, the goal of being less cynical is even more crucial.
Cynicism is part of a defensive posture we adopt to protect ourselves. It is usually triggered when we feel hurt or angry about something, and instead of dealing with those emotions directly, we allow them to weaken and distort the real perspective of things. When we become cynical towards something, we can start to slowly burn a firecracker fuse. It can turn from something that slightly annoys you to starting to have a hostile attitude continuously ... andYou light the fuse and the powder ends up exploding.
The dictionary makes its meaning clear: "Attitude of the person who lies boldly and defends or practices in a shameless, shameless and dishonest way something that deserves general disapproval.
When does cynicism appear
Cynicism often arises when negative emotions or perceptions we have of ourselves are directed towards the people around us. Many of the cynical emotions arise when we feel vulnerable and / or with low self-esteem and unconsciously want to protect ourselves. In the moments when we feel vulnerable and discouraged, we are much more likely to react by hardening ourselves and being defensive, even if it is really just a facade.
A greater susceptibility to cynicism can be a sure sign that we are focused on ourselves, being excessively self-centered. When we enter this state of mind, we are often seeing those around us through the same critical filter, but in reality it is seeing ourselves projecting. It's like an overly critical inner voice.
You may judge yourself harshly but you project that inner critic onto the people around you. Maybe you start to see a person you love only for their flaws without having compassion for their inner struggles, for example.
Because cynical and suspicious attitudes create a negative filter through which we observe our surroundings, when we are in this state, we tend to miss out on the joys in life. We indulge in an "us versus them" mentality that pushes us against a certain person or group. When we do this, it is valuable to ask ourselves: 'Whose point of view is it? Is this how I really feel, or am I overreacting based on old feelings from my past? "
These connections are not always easy to make, but very often, our cynical attitudes mirror those of influential figures from the past. The critical attitudes we are exposed to early in life, whether directed toward ourselves or toward other people, can shape the way we view people as we grow up. Events that make us feel vulnerable, hurt, or angry often trigger these age-old and often cynical reactions. As adults, it is our responsibility to separate these attitudes from our own and differentiate from early destructive influences, so as not to do emotional damage to others, nor to ourselves.
Being positive is a safer bet
Positive feelings actually make us more resilient when faced with negative circumstances. So the questions you should ask yourself are: «Why not look for the best in people?”, “Why do we make ourselves suffer for the failures in others?”, “How can we put aside points of view cynical and destructive and critical attitudes that lead us on a downward spiral? "
Avoiding cynicism does not mean avoiding the emotions they feel. It is not about being false with the environment. Rather, it is about alleviating our own suffering by dealing with emotions directly without allowing them to color the lens through which we view the world. Understand your own emotions And finding solutions if they make us feel bad is the best way to avoid cynicism and have a healthy relationship with oneself and with others. It is important to recognize our emotions and allow ourselves to feel them fully. Then we can decide how we want to act.
Instead of letting go of critical comments or gossiping about someone we feel provoked by, we can think about what is causing our cynical reactions. Are we projecting our self-attacks? Are we experiencing pain or anger? Afterwards it is a good idea to talk to someone else about those feelings, or at least acknowledge the feelings towards ourselves. If you put cynicism aside, you won't sabotage your experience.
When we are able to feel safe and secure in ourselves, we can better express compassion towards others without falling into the poison of cynicism. We can start by acknowledging that everyone struggles. Often times, when a person does something that hurts us, he acts from a defensive position and hurts himself. Some people may have worse traits than others, but they all have deficiencies.
Show compassion for others and yourself
La compassion it requires a unique combination of accepting that each of us has minds that think differently, while also realizing that we are all in the same boat, that we are all hurt in our own way. Counteract cynicism by allowing us to feel our anger, pain, or frustration without bringing these feelings to a dark place that hurts both us and those close to us in a dark way.
You are your thought and you create the world in which you live. If you cultivate compassion instead of cynicism, you will feel better and live more fully. You will begin to feel closer to the people close to you and you will feel more satisfied with yourself and with the life you lead. Destructive attitudes will be a thing of the past.